Finding Normal

So it has been about a month and a half since my wife and I lost our son Lukas.  We are trying to get things back to normal but honestly, we haven’t figured out what that really is any more.  Like everyone that goes through a tragic event I am sure there is a time period where everything that you once did on a daily basis just seems odd.  I have been over thinking just about everything that I do, from my job to my hobbies and even the decisions I make.  It is amazing to me how my paradigm has shifted and I am having a hard time figuring out exactly what I am supposed to do now.  When something happens with your family the only thing you really want to do is think about your family, but the world doesn’t stop for you.  You have to keep things moving along even though they might not seem as important as they did even a few weeks ago.

The emotions of the situation are still there, but coping with them is getting easier.  My mind-set is still up in the air as far as where we go from here but I realize that we don’t have to make any decisions now.  The only thing that seems certain these days is how much my wife and I love each other and how well we seem to work together to help each other get through the tough times.  That seems to be the only part of what was our “normal” that remains.

How do you find normal when you have no idea what it looks like anymore?  Do you just keep coasting along trying to make those things that used to be normal fit back into your now changed world?  Do you try new things and see if you stumble on to a new normal?  Honestly I don’t think anyone has an answer for this…I think each person has to figure it out for themselves and hope things somehow work their way out.

5 Comments Add yours

  1. Tammy says:

    You and Kami continue to be in my thoughts and in my prayers!

  2. Lisa says:

    Your posts are open, honest and touching. You and Kami are definitely blessed to have each other as you try to find your normal again. Keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers.

  3. Rebeka says:

    Love you guys and miss you even more. As for the question….Normal is what you make it. Normal changes from day to day and the only way to make things seem easier is just to keep doing them…even if they seem silly or useless. Just keep living your life and things will fall into place eventually. Take care of each other and that spunky dog of yours.

    1. letter 10 says:

      thanks Rebeka…we miss you guys too.

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