It is the season for anniversaries!  Yes, I missed my own parents 40th anniversary by a day because for some strange reason I ALWAYS enter it wrong on my calendars! (Sorry Mom & Dad!)

Yesterday was my brother and his wife’s anniversary and mine and my wife’s 10th anniversary is coming up toward the end of the month.  As I was upset with myself for completely lapsing on my parents 40th wedding anniversary I started to think about some things that I have really taken for granted over the years.  Number one on the list is that my parents have been married for 40 years!

As a kid my brother and I did not know how lucky we were to have parents that stuck together and worked at their relationship enough to keep it going not only for them but for us.  Of course there are tough times, we didn’t see them but after being married for nearly 10 years myself I know they were there.  Frankly if you can be married to someone for 40 years and not have some arguments and disagreements then there is something creepy going on…seriously…it would creep me out.

To step back and think about the wonderful example on marriage that we had growing up I am so thankful to have that moving into my 11th year of marriage.  I was able to see how as parents decisions were made, conflict was dealt with and fun was had by most everyone for an extended period.  Not just hit or miss happiness…I mean honest, long-term happiness.  As kids we never knew about financial issues, theoretical differences, or even my parents just getting tired of being around each other.  We were protected from anything such as that and it was important.  We were always a family…always on the same side and always working together to keep the streak of happiness going.

I understand now.  Being older and in my own marriage I understand that you are not trying to win anything.  You are trying to keep each other as happy as possible for as long as possible…that is the goal.  It isn’t to be right or win the arguments, those don’t mean anything.

So if you are celebrating your anniversary this month, CONGRATULATIONS!  And here’s a toast (of coffee, it’s early!) to your many more years of continued happiness!

2 responses to “Anniversary”

  1. Thanks Jay! My parents were married 38 when my dad passed. And you words are wonderful as I enter into marriage on what would have been my parents’ 51st wedding anniversary on July 29th. I may print and keep your post with me for a wonderful reminder. Mariann.

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